Giving Thanks

Since it is the day before Thanksgiving gratitude is heavy on my mind. You may or may not know that I live my life according to the principles of the Laws of Attraction. I have learned that gratitude and appreciation are important - why?

Realizing what you have to be grateful for forces you to show more appreciation for it. This can include material possessions but the people in your life and the experiences you have had are much more important.

When you truly appreciate someone it will come through in the way you interact with them. Try this little tip - it will improve your outlook on life...REALLY:

Each morning before you get out of bed take a moment to reflect on all that you have to be grateful for. Then choose a focus for your day from the list. At various times throughout the day think about all the wonderful things that person or experience has brought into your world.

HAPPY THANKSGIVINGS!!!!

Bedroom Fun Begins Elsewhere

This is just a little reminder that if you want to have a great time in the bedroom then you need to begin your seduction efforts early in the day. I am not saying that you won't have fun if you don't plan things out but I am saying that you can build the excitement throughout the day and make the bedroom time even more exhilarating.

Dirty talk is one way to create an air of excitement. Let your partner know that you are looking forward to the fun ahead. The more explicit you are about the details of the fun you plan to have the more the excitement will build. Whisper to your lover some of the little comments that are usually saved for the bedroom.

Treat your lover with kindness at every interaction and use naughty little comments to add some spice to your conversations. Besides the dirty talk you can have some items handy in the bedroom that will add to your fun.

Candle light is always a soothing glow that adds ambiance to a room. Body oils can be used for mutual massages. Body paint can be fun and lead to lots of interesting activities and discussions. Consider playing games to add some fun.

Bathing together can be both soothing and exciting. Okay, I'm stopping for now but that should be enough to get you started on the pathway to a fun and eventful evening!

Ideas And Suggestions????

I write articles on a daily basis - most of them are related to ways to improve relationships. In fact, I am also working on a new product that will consist of several ebooks or modules....each will cover one specific topic related to the category of relationships.

I plan to have one on dating, one on communication in a relationship, one on keeping the love alive - basic ways to enhance a relationship, commitment, plus lots more. Each module will be available as an individual purchase or the entire package will be available at a special offer price.

Additionally the products will be available in audio and as a regular book format for purchase at Amazon.

I am always open to any ideas or suggestions for blog topics, article topics, or things to include in my product package. Please shoot me an email at: SundayDeb@gmail.com or leave a comment here at the blog.

Thanks for reading!

A Great Gift Idea

Are you having trouble coming up with a gift idea for your partner? I know how it is, you want to give them something meaningful but you do have a budget to consider. I always say that really knowing your partner helps in this situation because you can fall back on some of their interests or hobbies.

For example, if your boyfriend likes to fish you can choose from a large assortment of fishing supplies - there's something for every budget, from fishing tackle all the way up to a boat! If your girlfriend is into sewing you could buy her sewing supplies or the latest model of sewing machine. If your partner likes to read you could buy a book or a gift certificate to a nice bookstore.

But what if you still don't have any ideas? It's still easy.....think about this for a moment. We all love to have nice things said to us, right? With the company that sends the messages in a bottle you can write your own message or choose from what seems to be thousands of wonderfully crafted messages. They thought of everything! The messages cover every holiday - including Christmas and Valentine's Day, and they cover every occasion - including birthdays, anniversaries, and even break ups!

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Steps To Getting Your Ex Back

I constantly get questions about how to get an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend back....but perhaps it is my imagination but I believe the past month or so there have been an enormous amount of break ups. Do you think it has anything to do with the economy or maybe with the fact that the holidays are approaching?

Anyway, I wanted to re-post the basic steps to getting your ex back so that a greater number of people could benefit. I realize that only a small portion of my readers actually email me their questions.

Okay, here it is - the break up happens. It might seem to come from out of no where or maybe you were expecting it. Either way, you are not happy about it and you want your ex back.

The first thing you need to do is deal with your hurt and frustration. Allow your emotions to come out in a healthy way. Some people take time off from work and to some degree they take time off from everything to allow for this phase. It is healthy to cry and vent but it is not healthy to harm yourself or others in any way, shape or form.

Give yourself a time limit for that phase. It should not be anymore than a week. Three days is better if you can manage that. Next you need to devote time for you. This is an opportunity to indulge in whatever it is that you enjoy. Suggestions include watching movies that you love, reading books, painting, bowling, ....etc. You get the idea, do the things that you like to do. Socialization is good but spending time alone can also be helpful. You see, during this time you will also be evaluating your relationship.

Do be honest with yourself. Determine if the relationship was a healthy one and why it is that you want your ex back. You may find that it really is not what you want.
But if it is this will give you the time to assess what problems exist and how they can be resolved. It will also provide you with the time necessary to develop a plan of getting your ex back.

You should begin slowly - taking care to add in any elements that were missing from the relationship before. If you want specifics then I recommend the ebook, "The Magic of Making Up." This ebook will provide the details needed from start to finish to getting your ex back. Your renewed relationship will be stronger than ever! You can get more information about the ebook in the blog side panel or by clicking here:
The Magic Of Making Up

Should Sex Be Used As A Reward?

I received a question last week about how to handle a partner that 'only gives sex as a reward for good behavior'.

As I pondered this particular situation I wondered if all of us perhaps use sex in some ways. For example, have you ever had sex with your partner on a special occasion because it was a special occasion and not necessarily because you wanted it? If so, was that sex a part of the celebration and if it was who benefited from it?

Of course we commonly read about the wife that fakes orgasm or the other one that has a headache. And yes, I even get requests from men that want to know how to handle a partner that wants sex more than they do.

What are your thoughts? Please post any comments here or you can email them directly to me at: SundayDeb@gmail.com

Take The Time To Get To Know Your Partner

I know this sounds silly to stress but it really is important that you truly know your partner. Learn everything you can about him or her. This not only adds to your friendship but it puts you in a great position in lots of other ways as well.

For example, if you truly know your partner then you will understand his or her actions better. You will understand and accept the way they behave because you are in touch with their inner self.

Another advantage will be when it comes to buying your partner gifts. If you really know what matters to your partner then you won't have to wonder what would be a well appreciated gift.

Ideally you will take the time to know and understand your partner before the relationship grows and continue this learning process throughout the process. Just a thought for the day.....if you need to know your partner better then why not begin working on that right now? Dedicate at least 20 to 30 minutes today for a real conversation with your partner. Make it focused on your partner. Ask open-ended questions so you get real responses instead of a yes or no answer.

Then continue the art of conversation with your partner daily. You may find out that he or she is more interesting than you thought!

A Little About Me

I thought I would tell you about myself and my background. I just wanted you to understand how and why I am involved in relationship information and advice.

First of all, you need to know that my life experiences have been varied. Because of that I have had all types of relationships and met some very interesting people along the way.

I married my first husband when I was only 19. I really think the appeal was the adventure of being married - I just wanted to try it because as a little girl I had always dreamed about growing up and being married. Well that marriage ended in divorce 4 1/2 years later. However, I did have a beautiful daughter during that time.

Although I did not marry again for a few years I was constantly involved with the man that I am now married to, my life partner. I cannot say that it was love at first sight for us but I will say that he completely rocked my world after I got to know him.

When we got married I was a stay at home mom. That is what we both wanted. Within the first few years of marriage we had two sons. Life was great - for awhile. But soon I realized that I wanted more in my life than cleaning house and taking care of others. How ironic is this - I decided to go to nursing school.

After receiving my BSN I worked at a large psychiatric hospital. You probably know that nurses have to work odd hours sometimes. My shift was 7p to 7a. It did not take long for that to have a negative impact on my marriage and my family life.

I moved into administration. I became the Nurse Educator. I did that for about 7 years and then I moved into Organizational Development. I became a practitioner and I went back to school. That is when I found my attraction to the Internet.

Throughout all of this my marriage has had its ups and downs. In fact, my husband and I even separated for a period of about six months.

Anyway, the psychiatric background has helped me in all aspects of my life...including my understanding of others and relationships. I also should add that living life adds to anyone's knowledge base.

My kids are all grown now. I also raised a girl from the age of 15 on. That's a long story but I feel in my heart that she is also my daughter. Amazingly she and my youngest son are now together. I am very fortunate!

So after living and learning and researching and studying I have learned a lot about relationships. I am a good listener - I've always been told that and people have always come to me for advice. I am always amazed that most people really only want someone to listen to them. I know that is true because many times I have listened to a friend or colleague only be told that they appreciated my advice. In reality I did not give advice, instead I offered to really listen to them and allow them to vent.

You see most people already have the answers to their problems but until they have an opportunity to talk about it they don't realize it. Or perhaps it is easier to do something that maybe you don't want to do if you can tell yourself that someone else thinks that is what you should do...

Okay - that's enough about me! The point is that I love learning and researching about human interactions and relationships. I want to help you in anyway that I can.

The Difficulties Of Dealing With A Break Up

Break ups are never easy. It really does not matter which side of the fence you are on - a break up forces changes in your life. And let's face it, some of us do not like changes of any kind.

That alone can make the break up difficult to accept. After all, you had things working in a sort of system or routine - you basically knew what you would be doing, where you would be doing, and who you would be with - that is, until the break up.

When you mix in the fact that you are devastated by your loss it is understandable that you are depressed and miserable. But that is not what this post is about. This post is to provide encouragement and support.

I always encourage people living through such a difficult time to allow a few days or even a week to accept and adjust to the idea of the change. I know that the sadness and feeling of loss may continue for a lot longer but you mentally need time to adjust. During this period you should allow yourself to seek refuge in a comfortable place (staying home is a popular choice) and to verbalize your feelings and even openly cry (it is healthy to vent your emotions).

But at the end of that stage you need to move forward. Start by focusing on being good to yourself and getting to know you - the person that has been hiding since during your relationship days. Get in touch with that person that has been neglected in some way and make it up to yourself.

This is a great time to read a self-development or self-improvement book. Focus on building your confidence and self-esteem. In other words, be all you can be. This makes you a stronger and more attractive person.

It is at that time that you can really begin moving into the future. If you want your ex back then you will be ready to work on that. If you want to leave the past behind you and move forward you will be a pillar of strength that is ready for a new beginning.

I always say that things happen for a reason and they turn out just the way they are supposed to. It is our job to allow the good to come to us. Be sure to sign up to receive your free report on "Building Lasting Relationships" - use the form in the sidebar. If you need help getting through a break up you should consider "The Magic Of Making Up" - that book has helped lots of people and it is going strong - watch the videos on this blog and check out the ebooks available. You will find the help you need!

Best of luck in all you do!

Can Your Relationship Go The Distance In Life?

Sometimes I get questions from people wanting to know if I think their relationship will last. Sadly I cannot predict which relationships are strong enough to survive life's up and downs and which are not.

But you should have a good understanding of how strong your relationship really is. I always advocate building a relationship on a solid foundation of friendship. The truth is that those are the relationships that seem to not only survive but they actually thrive as time goes on.

If your relationship was not founded on friendship then it will be necessary to build that friendship as time goes on. Don't worry, lots of couples start their relationship without a solid friendship and they build it over time. As long as you become great friends the rest will be much easier - after all, you already have the love that is necessary for a great bond!

In building or strengthening your relationship work on doing things together that you both enjoy. Engage in real conversations. Spend time together doing whatever possible. Hold hands and cuddle up. Learn all you can about one another and add an activity to your relationship that will create a new bond.

With love and friendship your relationship will go far!!!

Making Your Relationship The Most It Can!

Hello,

Today I want to talk to you a little bit about how you can make the most of the relationship you have. Let me begin by saying that a relationship needs to have a solid foundation of friendship for long-term survival.

That is important because life has a way of throwing us curve balls. When that happens we will want to have the support of our partner. A friendship helps to insure that our relationship will survive those curve balls.

But as time goes on we often find that our relationship is somewhat stale. So what can we do to liven it up - to get it back where it used to be? Let me say that I believe finding the hidden spark can easily be done if you go back to the basics.

Remember how the relationship started. Consider what your initial attraction was and how you treated each other then. Take the time to really remember what it was like.

Go back to some of those behaviors. It may be that you used to call your partner daily while you were away from home. Why not do that again? Or how about writing a note or a card that expresses your heartfelt desires for your relationship.

Plan a few special times together. You could have a special night out or even make a weekend of it. Spend some one-on-one time. Focus on your partner.

By making your relationship a priority you will find that it becomes alive again! Enjoy what you have. Continue to give it the love and attention required to keep it growing! Make it a lifelong event!

Best of luck - Talk Soon!!

Debbie C. Allen

Watch This Video!

How To Get Your Ex Back; Part Two

After all the work you have done to get yourself back in great emotional shape you do not need to do anything that will put that at risk. So if you contact your ex you need to be prepared for whatever may happen. It is always wise to determine where you stand with your ex before contacting him or her. In many cases this is done through a mutual friend.

But you should begin slowly regardless of how things seem to be going. An 'accidental' meeting could be arranged with the sole purpose being to say hello and a real quick conversation. This initial meeting should be very brief. Another option is to call your ex. I suggest that you plan a purpose behind the call. There is usually something left behind by the ex that you could call him or her about. Or you could just call and say that you wanted to say hi and see how he or she was doing. This should be acceptable since you were so important to each other such a short time ago.

The initial meeting should allow you to determine if your ex has an interest in the relationship. Remember to keep the first meeting brief. This includes phone calls. Keep in mind that you have been working on making yourself stronger. Let that strength shine through.

If the initial meeting or phone call results in your ex asking about a date or another meeting of some sort remember to move ahead slowly. I am not suggesting that you play hard to get, but I am cautioning you against jumping right back into the relationship.

I know that it is hard to resist but you need to keep in mind that your goal is to create a lasting relationship. Obviously there were problems with the relationship in the past. If those issues are not clearly defined, addressed, and resolved they will rear their ugly heads again.

Do not set yourself up for another failed relationship. This time work on developing an open, respectful, honest, and trusting relationship. This will be built on a strong foundation of friendship. The only other ingredient required is love and you already have that.

For complete advice and guidance related to getting your ex back you should check out "The Magic of Making Up." This is the number one resource of its kind! You can find details about the ebook in the right-hand column of this blog and in other blog posts. Get the book and you will be on your way to getting your ex back!!!