Empty Nest And Beyond

After years of child-rearing couples find that there comes a time in life when the children move out to establish a life of their own. This can be a confusing time for parents. Of course they want their children to grow but at the same time this means the couple will have to make some adjustments in their relationship.

A common realization for couples when their children begin moving out is that they will soon be alone together. For some couples this may be the first time in their relationship that they will not have to address the issues of raising children. For others, it has been so many years ago that they had any time without children that it will seem like the first time.

Although this is a time that couples look forward to and work for there is usually some apprehension about how things will be once the household consists only of the two of them. This is especially true of couples that have lost touch with each other over the years.

It seems that the responsibilities of children, work, a mortgage and life in general often take center stage. This is unavoidable at times and when those things take over more often than they should it is easy to forget that your focus should be on your partner.

So many couples are faced with the dilemma of how to relate to one another when they feel much of the closeness that they once had is now gone. Just as with anything else, planning will make this transition easier. Plan ahead, you know that this time will inevitably happen sooner or later.

You should discuss plans with your partner. There may be some interests that the two of you put on hold during the time you were focused on raising kids. If so this is the time that you should plan to rediscover that interest or hobby. Plan an activity that the two of you can enjoy together.

Now I am not suggesting that because the children move out that you and your partner should spend every minute together, far from it. Actually you will now have more time available for your partner as well as for yourself.

Along with renewing old interests in hobbies from the past consider new things to do together. The reason this is important is that spending time together on an enjoyable activity will help to renew the relationship and build a new bond between the two of you. It will give you an activity to talk about together and quality time to spend together.

During this exciting phase of your relationship you should rediscover yourself and your spouse. Build on what you have and improve it! Things will only get better.

Sign up for my free report that covers lots of ways to create and enhance a relationship - the sign up form can be found in the sidebar.

How Would You Rate Your Relationship?

It seems that many of us work hard to get the man or woman of our dreams and then we feel our work is done. It is done because we have that person in our life. We can see them on a daily basis - we can sleep with them every night and we know what they are doing most of the time.

So as time goes on we are likely to take for granted the time we have with them. We tend to overlook some of the cute little things they say and do simply because it's not new to us anymore. As a matter of fact, we might notice that we are receiving the same or similar treatment from our partners.

At such a point we have two options, first, we can continue as we have been and allow things to work themselves out for better or worse, or second, we can be proactive and work toward improving our relationship.

Although the relationship may still seem fine at this point it is likely that there is an undercurrent waiting to cause real damage. Don't let that happen. Immediately begin working at making your relationship more exciting.

Consider the way things were in the early stages of your relationship and strive to get that back. Make phone calls to your partner during work hours just to say hello and that you love him/her. Leave little notes that will let him/her know you love them. Buy them small gifts for no reason at all. Pay attention to them when they speak. Plan special dates and surprises.

Okay - I am sure you get the idea. The point is that if you ignore the signs that your relationship is getting boring matters will only get worse.

Some couples are fine with a relationship that lacks excitement but if given the choice most would prefer a little sparkle and spice from time to time. Work on your sparkle today and you will have spice tonight!

Do You Want Your Ex Back?

I get emails regularly asking how to get an ex back. First of all it is important to realize that I can list steps to take and I can suggest other resources that may be helpful, but any information supplied will need to be altered to fit your individual personality and circumstances.

My first suggestion is allowing yourself time to accept the break up. This means different things to different people. Ultimately you will be able to discuss the situation without being so emotional that the discussion ends in tears or in anger.

After you reach this state of rationality you will be able to determine what went wrong and how you can fix things. I also suggest that you spend time working on you. Indulge yourself in ways that you have not done in recent times. Allow time for hobbies and reading. Work on eating healthier and exercising more.

You will find that you will grow as a person and will of course be making yourself better and more interesting to others. This includes your ex!

Speaking of your ex - you should avoid contact for awhile. I cannot give you a magic number of days or weeks to avoid him or her - that again will depend on the situations that you are dealing with. The real point is that you should allow yourself time to develop a plan so that you do not appear overly anxious to see or speak to your ex.

It is beyond the scope of this post to go into all the details of how to get an ex back but you can learn everything you need to know in "The Magic of Making Up" - that ebook has saved countless marriages and relationships.

I wish you the best of luck and please feel free to post comments here or to email me at: SundayDeb@gmail.com

Make Memories Together; Creating A Night To Remember!

Whether you are involved with the perfect person or not you may find that after awhile your relationship has lost some of the excitement it once had. It might be that you have gotten busy with a job or other responsibilities that you really do not have a lot of control over. But you need to make your relationship a priority. Take the time to create a special night. One night could make a huge difference in the way you and your partner get along.

Let's openly talk about the way that relationships can become dull and boring over time. It does not mean that the love is gone or that it is less than it was in the beginning. But what it does mean is that your relationship could use a little dusting off; you need to do something to liven it up a little. This article is about creating a night to remember. Do that in order to make memories together that you can enjoy forever.

Okay, I am not silly enough to believe that what makes a night special for me will necessarily make it special for anyone else. But because this event is being done to enhance your relationship I suggest that you try to create a night that will be special for your partner. That is, if you are working out the details alone. If the two of you plan the night then both partner's likes and dislikes should be considered.

Many of us enjoy having a complete night away from home for such an event. I encourage that. Being at home allows for too many obstacles to come into play. Things like people calling or dropping by. That could totally ruin the intent of the evening.

Another distraction can be the TV or even video games. I know that sounds silly to some but for others those things are very important. Other problems can be the computer or even a book or hobby. Getting away from home can help to keep the focus on the real purpose of the evening.

I will not try to plan a night for anyone but myself, however, I will offer some suggestions. If budget is a concern then keep in mind that the only necessary cost involved in this night will be where you stay. That can be minimized by shopping around. In fact, you could even consider a camping trip.

Decide ahead of time about your meals. You could pack a romantic picnic basket, complete with candles and wine or champagne and simply eat in your room. Or perhaps eating out would add to the event for you and your partner. The options are many.

Another tip is to agree before you begin the evening that you will leave any negatives out of your conversations. Additionally you might want to agree not to discuss specific people or topics that will keep you focused on your home life. Instead strive to focus on making the night special for each other.

Perhaps a simple card could be bought ahead of time and you can present it to your partner at the appropriate moment. Don't forget to take along a camera, you never know when you will want to capture a moment.

I always include a few candles and lotion or a soothing oil for massages. Almost everyone enjoys a relaxing massage from time to time. You can decide to spend the entire evening in your room or you can find local entertainment that suits you.

A quiet walk or window shopping is easy on the budget and can lead to long and heartfelt conversations. That is what this night is all about; getting back in touch with each other. Embrace the opportunity and take advantage of it, your relationship will grow because of it!

A Bedroom Picnic

Okay - this is one of my favorite things to do.....for me it is fun and romantic.

I make all the plans without involving my husband. I decide on some great food items and something wonderful to drink - yes, alcohol is usually involved! lol Then I prepare the bedroom for the picnic.

I am a lover of candles and great fragrances - I still burn incense! I like soft lighting and wonderful smells. I also enjoy music so I insure that I have the right music available.

Because I enjoy using the floor as a picnic area I will set out a nice comforter or blanket to sit on. I place lots of pillows around the area as well.

Now back to the actual picnic items. I am a vegetarian so I am perfectly content with not having any meat but my husband isn't. I try to include things that we both will enjoy. Sometimes I have a cheese tray with selected meat items, sometimes I stick with fresh fruit and vegetables, it really depends on the mood and the day. A nice loaf of great bread can be awesome. The picnic is not about eating really - it is about spending quality time with my husband.

This gives us an opportunity to really talk and get back to the basics of our relationship. Sometimes the picnic will end and we will go watch TV or simply carry on with our regular routines - other times the picnic results in an eventful night!
The point is that the picnic does not necessarily imply that we are going to do any particular thing to finish the night - but it opens the doors to lots of possibilities.

A bedroom picnic is fun! Try it and see what you think.

Getting Your Relationship Back On Track

Every relationship has its ups and downs. Have you ever visited a website of a relationship guru that says his or her relationship is perfect all the time? If you find one like that chances are he or she does not live in the real world.

I consider myself to be happily married and my husband and I have a strong relationship - but that does not mean that we don't get upset with one another from time to time and even treat each other will less respect than we should occasionally.

Life happens to all of us and when we are faced with unpleasant situations and circumstances we react. Unfortunately this might include being less the partner than we should be. Hopefully these times will be very short-lived and we can simply apologize and make up. After all, we want happiness in our relationship and to have that we need to be on the right track.

So how do we get back on the right track to treating our partner the way we should? Heart felt apologies really can go a long ways toward a resolution to the problem. But if the apology is not sincere or demonstrated with positive actions then the apology will have little meaning.

So begin with a real apology and then work at making things better. You might have to analyze first where and why things escalated to the point that they did. After all, it is difficult to solve a problem if you don't know what the real problem is. The key to getting back on track is finding a way to limit or eliminate the root cause of the underlying problem. If you cannot do that then you will need to work at a better way of dealing with the undesirable situation or circumstances.

Talk with your partner about the problem -he or she may be able to help you with any dilemmas that you cannot figure out for yourself. By involving your partner you will be explaining what has bothered you. This open communication is beneficial for a relationship. Your partner will be better able to understand your actions and behaviors --- this does not justify them, but having an understanding can help to alleviate some of the frustration felt by your partner.

Emotional Affairs; When Does A Friendship Cross The Line?

Every great relationship has a strong foundation. That foundation includes knowing all you can know about your partner. By having an understanding of what each of you find acceptable you can prevent future problems. This includes guidelines for outside friendships.

One of the preliminary steps to developing a strong foundation to your relationship is that of getting to know your partner. This includes learning about their feelings related to approval of friendships outside of the relationship. You really need to know if they accept friendships you already have and how they will feel about your associations with others in the future. This information will be helpful in knowing what friendships your partner may feel cross the line. Emotional affairs are very common and many platonic friendships seem to open the door to such affairs.

To begin let us define what an emotional affair is. In such friendships the partner gives an investment of emotional time and energy to the friendship. Not only that but he or she also receives emotional support and companionship.

As the platonic friendship grows and the emotional bonds get stronger there is a drain of the intimacy in the primary relationship. In fact, most experts consider emotional affairs as a form of cheating without sex. Studies have shown that emotional affairs very often open the door to full blown affairs.

Very often these friendships do start out innocently enough. But as they evolve there is an ever-increasing sharing of intimate information. The emotional affair is kept secret from the primary partner. And whether it is acknowledged or not, there is almost always a sexual attraction.

As time goes on time with the 'friend' becomes more interesting and important than time with the partner. The person involved in the emotional affair spends time thinking about the 'friend' when he or she is not around. There may be attempts at creating opportunities to have contact with the 'friend'.

The partner involved in the friendship may be completely guilt-free due to the absence of sex in the friendship. But as the friendship grows the primary relationship is likely to deteriorate. Since the partner has a support person within the friendship he or she may feel it is no longer needed with the primary partner.

Because the partner does not share information about the friendship there are lies, deception and betrayal. The primary partner is likely to view the emotional affair as damaging as a sexual affair; in some cases even more so. It seems some of us can accept our partner venturing out for sexual variety but when our partner is seeking emotional support and companionship elsewhere we feel extreme pain and hurt feelings.

As the friendship is justified as just a friendship the involved partner may continue to rationalize that it is acceptable. Then eventually he or she may find that there is a greater bond with the 'friend' than with the primary partner. The problems that can arise can end a relationship.

By understanding your partner early in your relationship you will know what is acceptable in outside friendships. You have a responsibility to share your heartfelt sentiments related to such matters. This opens the floor for a discussion that could prevent lots of problems in the future.

If you find that you are involved in a friendship that may cross over into an emotional affair you can step back and examine what the real attraction is. In most cases it will be a warning sign that you need to work on your primary relationship and focus all emotional energy there.

Sometimes It's The Small Things That Are Big!

I was spending some time with my husband earlier today - we sat down together to watch a movie. With all the channels we have we still could not find a movie that sounded interesting or that we had not seen. He like action and science fiction and I like romance and drama. it's really hard to find a movie that we both want to watch! :)

John, my husband always hands me the remote and lets me choose. Not that he is always happy with what I want to watch - but he is willing to watch whatever I pick. We like to sit side by side on the sofa. We cuddle and I always grab a throw for my lap - I am one of those people that is always cold. John knows that so he will hold my hands in his to keep them warm.

I just left John to come and write this post and do a few things at the desk - but he is certainly on my mind. On a daily basis he does things for me - it's just a part of who he is. I am very fortunate to have a husband like John and I am even more fortunate to have realized that.

If you are in a situation similar; one in which your partner is kind and loving then take notice of that and let him or her know that you appreciate it. If you are guilty of not being as kind and loving as you should be, then acknowledge that and work to do a better job.

Little things really can make a big difference in a relationship. Sometimes those things are right under our nose and we miss them. Pay attention to what you give and what you receive. You can enhance your relationship without any great effort.

Is Your Relationship Abusive?

When you find that special person you are sure to feel that your life is now complete. Your quest is finally over as you now have the person of your dreams. Sadly many people find that this person soon becomes a monster and escape is all they want.

It seems to happen overnight, the once perfect relationship is suddenly something quite different. You may find that you dread being around your partner. This could be because of fear of physical abuse or even the frustration and humiliation of emotional abuse. Either way your relationship is definitely in trouble. Surprisingly, many people accept abuse for a period of time before realizing that it is clearly a problem. If you suspect that your relationship may be an abusive one then it most likely is.

Abusive relationships often start out very different. In fact, a partner may seem very caring and concerned in the beginning. Part of this is that the partner is likely to be very possessive and jealous. In order to accommodate those needs he or she is likely to appear very attentive at first. This attentiveness can be flattering.

The attentiveness may mask the possessiveness for a period of time. But it is likely that soon you will realize that your new partner is attempting to monopolize your time. His or her jealousy may be as extreme as to include being jealous of long time friends and even family members.

Sometimes the partner decides that by giving in and spending time with the new partner many arguments can be avoided. This is likely to have a snowball effect. The more you give in the more controlling your mate becomes and expects you to give in.

Many people in abusive situations become very secretive about what is going on in the relationship. This may be due to fear or even shame and embarrassment. After all, we do realize that a healthy relationship is not abusive in anyway but once we are involved and in the middle of the mess getting out can seem almost impossible.

There are various types of abuse; physical, emotional, verbal, and sexual. We all have a clear understanding of what physical abuse is. But it is important to understand that even if there are no marks left behind, abuse is abuse. When it comes to emotional and verbal abuse we are referring to abusive language as well as degrading comments. And anytime sex is used as a tool or weapon it is wrong.

Abusive partners find ways to twist the circumstances so that the blame is always yours. Besides using humiliation as a weapon he or she attempts to control your life in ways that a partner should not. He or she may demand that you dress a certain way or refrain from doing something that seems harmless. He or she may threaten you or threaten to harm their self if things do not go the way they want them to.

Abusive relationships are never healthy. A healthy relationship is built on the foundation of respect, consideration and trust. If you are involved in a relationship that lacks that foundation then it is time to make some immediate changes. I always say that you cannot give love appropriately if you do not love and care for yourself first. It is time to put yourself first. Take the initial steps toward the future that you deserve and get help now! 

Perfect Christmas Gift

I recently posted about Christmas Gift ideas but I had two emails this morning requesting this information. As seen on Oprah, this is the company that provides elegant messages on parchment-like paper. The message comes in a beautiful bottle of your choosing and it is sent in a wooden container to ensure safe delivery. You can write your own message or choose from hundreds of professionally written messages.......there is sure to be one that fits your exact needs and personality.

I am sure you will be proud of giving this gift and it will be cherished. Check it out below!


Timeless Message in a Bottle stands alone in quality and elegance. Personalized,unique, and only the finest of quality. A Personalized Christmas,Anniversary,
A Fabulous Marriage Proposal or any of life's special occasions or just to say I love you. "When Cards and Flowers are not enough" send a Timeless Message."We've Captured the Art...of Speaking to the Heart.

A Break Up Can Be Devastating; How To Get Through The First Days

Your reaction to a break up is very dependent on your personality type and how strong the relationship was. For some people simply picking up the pieces of their broken heart and moving on is the answer but for others it will take a lot of work - especially if the goal is to get the ex back.

As human beings it is in our nature to love others. Living and loving is what we do. Some of us are very free with our feelings and share them quickly. For others it takes a lot to get us to open up and share ourselves.

It seems that for that group of people a break up can often be even more devastating than for most people. Perhaps you fall into that classification. I know I do.

I love people but in order for me to really let someone see the real me, the me that is on the inside, I have to have strong feelings for them. And when I decide to open up my heart to someone I feel very vulnerable.

I guess that goes back to my first love. Okay, I know now that it was only a teenage love that would never had lasted but when it ended I was totally devastated. At the time I thought I was with the person that I would spend the rest of my life with.

Funny how time changes things! Anyway, lots of boyfriends and two husbands later I know that that loss was not a loss at all.

So I guess I am giving away my age here, but I have also raised four children, which are all grown now. So obviously I have dealt with not only my own but also the heartaches of my children as they were growing up and finding their significant others.

Well, my advice may not be the traditional but it is what I have found to work. When a break up first happens you are justified in feeling badly. Whether you do the breaking up or you get the axe break ups are hard. After all, you have opened to that person and shared intimate moments.

I say it is fine to let your grief and sorrow out but only for a day or two. After that you simply must focus on the rest of your life. For one thing, you can be grateful that you are feeling sad about a break up and not a death. You see, with a break up there is always the possibility of a make up.

I am not saying that every relationship should be saved but almost every one could be saved if approached correctly. So take a couple of days, or take a few days for your grieving. Eat your favorite comfort foods and cry when you feel like it. Do what makes you feel good.

Expressing your sadness is a good thing. The bad thing is that many times friends and family members are not as helpful as they would like to be. In fact, it seems that in many cases they seem to say and do exactly the wrong things. You will need to be patient with them and realize that their intentions are good.
But after a few days you really need to get a gripe on moving forward. Start by assessing the situation and consider what you need to do in order to move forward.

I always suggest that working on you is the absolute best start no matter what the circumstances are. Get yourself in good shape both physically and mentally. Be good to yourself. Treat yourself special in some way. If you like to read then go buy yourself a good book. If you like candles and soft music then indulge in that.

Self development can be a wonderful tool at a time like this. Do some research online. Take the time to work on yourself and to thoroughly evaluate where you are in life and the relationship that ended. This will help you make rational decisions about what your next step should be.

Relationships & The Importance Of Knowing Yourself

A key to a great relationship is finding someone that is what you really want and need. But that is a difficult task if you are not sure who you are and what you want, and what is essential to you.

Understanding yourself will aid in making wise relationship choices. For instance, if your dream is to have a home in the country with animals and kids running around then a relationship with someone that loves city life may be challenging. Compromises will need to be made or dreams will need to be forgotten.

Knowing how strongly you feel about particular issues will enable you to decide upfront which things can be negotiated and which are absolutely vital to a successful relationship for you. Kids are always a major issue. Some people want to have kids and others do not. Even if both of you want children there are lots of decisions to be made related to how they will be raised. Religion and education will be a concern.

Basic lifestyles are another important consideration. Some people are homebodies and others love the social life. Some people eat healthy foods and exercise regularly while others do not. All of these things and much more should be considered. Decide what you are willing to compromise on and what is an absolute deal breaker.

Build Your Relationship On Friendship For A Rock Solid Foundation

The average person becomes involved in at least a few relationships before finding one that is right. This is probably a good thing because the failed relationships are really not failures at all.

Like anything in life, when we do not totally succeed we should consider the experience as valuable because we were presented with the opportunity to learn. If you look back over your own or other relationships that you are familiar with that did not work for some reason you can learn more about what makes a lasting relationship.

For me it seems that honesty is essential in a trusting relationship. I have even known couples that had open relationships but if the honesty was not complete then there were problems.

When I consider the relationships that I have in my life and relationships of others that I am aware of it appears that the best ones involve two friends. I am sure that most if not all relationships begin with at least some form of friendship.

We meet someone, we think they are perfect for us, and the relationship continues. This is where many of us make a mistake. We assume that because this person seems so perfect for us that things will continue in a positive manner forever without any work on our part.

Whether you consider it work or fun, when the two of you are discussing hobbies, work, families, friends, or anything else you should be using that time to explore any areas that the two of you can use to increase the bond you already have.

For instance, if you both like to read but you like different types of books you could regular trips to your local bookstore and you could explore the shelves together. I know this does not sound like a lot but if this becomes a habit for your time together it will become a special time together.

You do not have to find extravagant or expensive things that will bond you. There are low-cost classes for practically any topic you can think of. Taking a class together means that you are committing to a long term project together. That in itself is a way of committing to one another.

Not only will you spend the time together but something like that helps to build memories that you will treasure for years to come. Be the best friend you can be to your partner and expect nothing less from him or her.

Get Your Ex Back In Five Easy Steps

When your heart is broken all you want is a quick fix. Unfortunately a quick make up will not repair the broken relationship. Other steps have to be taken before you can start to put the relationship back together.

Living through a difficult break up can be awful. You lose sleep, you may lose weight or the opposite, and you may gain weight. Many times people seem to lose interest in almost everything, they are depressed and that is all that can be said.

So the burning question is how can you get your ex back and how can you do it quickly; in a step by step fashion! The good news is that there are ways to make up with ex lovers but the bad news is that the work starts with you.

I know you want to get to the heart of this article so here are the five steps:

1) Get yourself in order
2) Get your home life in order
3) Assess your relationship
4) Considering your ex and his or her preferences develop your plan
5) Enact your plan

Number one is referring to you taking care of yourself. I know it is probably the last thing on your mind right now but now more than ever before it is important that you look and feel your best. Take care of you so that you can follow these steps.

Now that you are looking good it is time to get your life back in order. Start by cleaning your house. Yes, I know that sounds silly but trust me, it is all part of the bigger plan. You see, the better you feel about things the more confidence you will have and a lot will depend on your confidence.

You are already on step three. How easy is that; okay, you really do not have to answer that question. This step can take a little time because you truly need to be objective. Think about your relationship as if you were a stranger looking in at it. Write a description of what they might see. Describe the type of partners each of you are as well as any other details.

From there you can add your own perspectives. Really take your time with this. Remember that this is only a tool; it is meant to help you discover any shortcomings in the relationship and things that you may have missed before.

Now you are ready to develop a make up plan. Obviously you know your ex very well. Using that information combined with what you learned in step 3 you should create a plan that tailor made for you and your ex. Keep the following points in mind when constructing your plan:

1) Do not expect overnight results
2) Always focus on the interests of your partner when creating the plan
3) Do not be pushy
4) Your goal is to develop a slow but steady foundation for a solid future
5) Focus on the friendship first

You should now be ready to move forward with your plan. For ideas and specific techniques you can read the ebook called The Magic Of Making Up. I wish you all the best!!!

Christmas Gifts That Last!

Are you wondering what to get your partner for Christmas? Have you gone through a list of things and decided that none of them were right?

Don't worry, you are not alone. In fact, in yesterday's emails I had two requests for gift suggestions.

Funny that I would be asked that about people that I don't know but the reality is there are solutions that are not too difficult or costly for that matter.

Of course you want to give a gift that will be appreciated. One way to do that is to give a useful gift. For example, a golfer would probably appreciate something related to the activity. A scrap-booker would appreciate supplies, etc.

But if you really want to give a gift that will last you may need to go one step deeper. Wonderful memories last a lifetime. With that being said if you can plan a vacation or even a one-night getaway you will be creating a memorable gift. Even a special night out can be filled with magical moments that are not forgotten.

But of course we want to include a tangible gift...something that can be held and touched. A nice piece of jewelry fits that description nicely and you can find something to meet every budget. Another great gift is the message in a bottle. I am not including the link here but it is on this blog in the side panel and in other posts.

This company creates a wonderful message on parchment paper - you can write your own messages or choose from hundreds of professionally crafted messages. Then you select a bottle that the message will be delivered in. Again, there are lots to choose from and the prices vary. The glass bottle is protected by a small wooden crate that it is shipped in. To me this is one of the most wonderful gifts anyone could give or receive.

Okay - do you have some gift ideas now? I hope this helped!!!

The Mechanics Of A Break Up And The Remedy

Your friends and family are well intentioned. They think they know what is best for you when they say just move on. Some have said you should ignore your ex, just completely put him or her out of your mind, and others have suggested that you should be friends. But you know in your heart that all you want is what you had before.

Life can be cruel and it can be difficult. So what do you do; do you listen to your friends or do you follow your heart. Let me tell you a story about one of my friends because it might help you.

Natasha is a 21 year old student at a local college. She and David seemed to be the perfect couple until David met Tonya. David did not tell Natasha about Tonya right away. Actually, David and Tonya began seeing each other very innocently. They worked together after school at a diner and soon learned that they shared an interest in video games.

Natasha had always tried to shame David about playing video games, telling him that they are a waste of time and money. Tonya on the other hand not only discussed the games on the same level as David but she challenged him to a match at any game he wanted to play. Of course that was hard to refuse! David and Tonya’s friendship grew.

And as their friendship grew Natasha and David seemed to grow farther and farther apart. When David told Natasha about his friendship with Tonya she automatically jumped to conclusions and broke up with him. She assumed that David was doing a lot more with Tonya than just playing video games.

Now looking at this relationship from the outside it is much easier to see some things that can be done to fix the problems. Obviously we do not have the emotions to deal with here that Natasha does. But it is clear to me that Natasha could have handled this situation differently and if she had her relationship would be intact and probably stronger than ever.

Fast forward; Natasha bought the ebook, The Magic Of Making Up, and followed some advice in it. In a nutshell, Natasha and David are back together but it took some work. Natasha bought David a video game and asked him to teach her how to play it. She now enjoys video games, though certainly not as much as David or Tonya. Natasha and Tonya became friends but since that time Tonya has moved away.

David and Natasha are now engaged. Their future looks bright and for now at least David continues to include video games as part of his entertainment. Natasha has accepted this as part of David.

What Do You Want From Your Relatinship?

Are you looking for love, security, a friend, a partner.....or are you simply in search of romance?

What is it that makes a relationship one that you enjoy?

I suggest that you do a little soul-searching before entering into a relationship. When you know what you want you can more easily develop a plan that will take you there.

The Stages In Realtionships

Have you ever thought about the many stages or levels of involvement our relationships go through before we reach the stage of complete unity? I have.

It seems that all relationships begin with friendship and romance. The longer lasting ones build on the friendship throughout the life of the relationship.

What other stages do you think relationships go through? What do you believe it takes for us to reach a level of complete trust in another? When do we feel a sense of commitment; does that come after a certain thing has happened or been said?

Just pondering this morning....I would love your thoughts!