Thursday

Want To Keep Your Relationship Strong; Keep Your Problems To Yourself

A relationship is built around love and trust. Learning when not to talk about problems in the relationship can keep it strong and maintain that trust.

Getting frustrated with the people in your life is natural. As much as we would like to avoid it, it is inevitable that we will sometimes be annoyed or frustrated by something our partner does. Sometimes it is the little things and sometimes it will be bigger issues.

You may find that your partner leaves a coffee cup sitting on the counter each morning. Although you have asked repeatedly the cup is left there daily. Maybe your partner regularly forgets to give you phone messages regardless of their importance.

It could be anything really. Whatever it is about your partner that irritates you, large or small, should only be discussed between the two of you.

It is easy and somewhat natural to call a friend and compare notes about what goes on in your relationship to theirs. However you should be very careful about what you say. Complaining about your partner to someone else can definitely lead to trouble.

Remember that you are talking negatively about the person you love. This is the person that you have planned spending a lifetime with. In order to respect that person you should have regards for how they would feel if they knew what you were saying.

Obviously your mate may not care if you tell a friend about a coffee cup being left out. But there are many issues that he or she might care about. Consider how you would feel if your partner told friends and relatives about some of the little (or big) things that you do that are annoying.

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I know you are close to perfect but surely there are at least one or two flaws that could be mentioned. Nothing good could possibly be gained from sharing that sort of information with people outside of the relationship. Your friends and family members are probably not qualified to give unbiased opinions. Neither can solve your problems.

So by sharing information about your partner that should not be disclosed you will only create a lesser image of your partner in the eyes of the people you confide in. They may begin seeing your partner in a less than admirable way. This cannot help your relationship with your partner and in the end it could even damage your relationship with your friend.

Surely you can see that the issues should be worked out between the two of you and not be shared with others, unless of course, your partner does not mind you sharing such information. However, most of us would rather not have others know of some of the little annoying habits that we have. After all, we are not in a relationship with those individuals and our habits have no impact on them. Basically I am saying that it is none of their business.

The issues are for you and your partner. Respect the fact that the conflicts and annoyances should be resolved by the two of you. The feelings of your mate should always be a primary concern. Never do or say anything that you know would hurt him or her.





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